Parenting ouside of Manhattan....

Usually when anything being outside of Manhattan, I would consider them "refreshing". And yes, I am talking about being a parent and raising kids. I sometimes can't stand those ladies.

Over the years, I have met so many parents and their kids, whether they are friends, people I somewhat know, or people I don't really know well. Regardless how educated they are, how successful in life they are, or even how much moula they make, a lot of them are crappy parents. Their parenting sucks and that totally shows on the kind of kids they raise.

Whenever I see crappy parenting techniques, I would take mental notes and say to myself to "never do that to my kid. I don't want my kid grow up to act like so-and-so's kids". I am sure you do that sometimes too. So don't judge me for judging those parents.

To be fair, I also have seen some great parenting skills and their kids are totally cute in personalities. When that happens, I take notes too.

Over the weekend, we drove up to Lake Winnipesaukee in New Hampshire for a weekend get-a-way. The drive was about 5.5 hours each way. We feel so relaxed once leaving the city. If you don't know, this place is known for Mitt Romney's family vacation home. I got scared a little bit once driving into the area seeing all the Mitt Romney signage.

Anyways....

I met this mom from Boston who is in the similar business with me; who is into fitness just like me, and who has a 1 year old boy Baby B. I observed throughout the weekend how she cares for the baby thinking I would get a pointer or two. She also shared tons of experience and information with me.

Remember I used to absolutely hate talking about babies? And now I have turned myself into one of those ladies who has nothing but baby related subjects to talk about. One thing I do differently is that I ask people around me for permission to do so first :) And this weekend, it was almost non-stop baby and parenting talks. Our host, Auntie Lulu would always conveniently disappear when the conversation got too carried away. <-- I already warned her, estrogen/pregnancy hormones are contagious so she stayed away, hahaha, jk.

This family drives a sedan. On a weekend trip like this, the trunk was filled with things - three strollers, baby's travel essentials from diapers, changing clothes, travel size crib, booster seat, toys and floaties (Baby B loves water), bottles and all the other stuff I might have not got to see. On top of that, they had to pack for themselves and they also brought along a huge dog. I don't think they ever get to travel light.

Observation one: If a sedan is sufficient, I can make it work with our mid-sized SUV without having to worry about upgrading or up-sizing. Even with limited space, we can easily make the most of it, especially TB and I don't have a dog. We just have to be better packers.

As a mom, she is very happy and laidback, which directly reflects on how she cares for the baby. Baby B is a mama's boy but she lets him explore, walk everywhere, and touch everything. This lake house we stayed at was not really baby-proofed. Baby B was pressing the dish washer switches, opening the cabinet doors and taking cooking sheet out of it, playing with the switches of the stove (he didn't really figure out how it works) and getting himself familiar with the new environment. She watched from a distance but never once wanted to stop him. She talked to him and let him know what the buttons are for and granted, as strong as Baby B was, he was in no way turning on the fire or anything. Baby B would walk around the house and fall on his butts cushioned by the diaper. Without rushing to hold him up, she made sure no damage occurred and encouraged him to stand up on his own.

Observation two: Kids learn from experience and mistakes, just like us. I will not be an overprotecting parent who attend to the kid all the time, and I am sure TB won't either. We will let our kid run around as long as we have the eyes on him. But if he falls, he has to pick himself up - it's a life lesson.

At every meal, she would be in the kitchen looking around to see if there is anything Baby B can eat with his 5 new teeth, and she would improvise. Baby B was able to eat whatever we bought from the grocery store that weekends, such as, blueberries, bananas, peaches, and any snack available. She and the daddy would make grilled cheese sandwich or pasta as his meals. She let Baby B eat like the rest of us, of course, plus milk. And Baby B really enjoyed the food.

Observation three: I always think it's pretty stupid to pack baby food in all kinds of containers everywhere you go especially when your kid is old enough to eat anything anyway. I have seen a very attentive mom labeled all containers, which I even lost count of how many for that meal, carried in a separate baby bag along with the regular baby bag she carried. That just made me roll my eyes. I think by eating all ranges of foods, baby grows the immunity to fight against allergies or other things (ok, I admit, it's only my theory).

Baby B loves water. He has been taking swimming lessons early on. She said he is just to small to understand or to be afraid (of water), but he already knows to paddle and get his nose out of the water. Every morning, she took him out for a swim time. It might be just him soaking in water and playing the splashes, but he absolutely loved it.

Observation four: My kid will start the swimming lesson as early as the class will take him. I swim, so there is no question my kid will too. It's such a great skill to have even if it's not for the fitness purpose.

As laidback as the parents are, Baby B still got a lot of disciplines. Of course he cried, he made fuzzes, and he woke up too early in the morning and so on, but compared to a lot of lousy parents and their crazy kids, I would say I totally admire what she does to Baby B.

I took a lot of notes over the weekend on parenting and her thoughts on how to survive the first couple months.

As of now, I don't know what kind of parent I will be. Am I going to be super liberal and let the kid grow up by himself? Or am I going to "hold his hands" every step of the way with all the control power I have? I have no idea. However, I am definitely learning a lot from observing other parents. Maybe I will do a mix and match style, like how I like my outfits :)

We are doing research on child psychology and early development books (too many of them, not knowing which one to buy). Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom is definitely on my list. I know, it's not really a "development" type of book and I am surprised I have not already read this book. It's always good that I am reminded again the way I was brought up and how I should apply the experience on my kid.

I am all for Tiger Mom approach and I know my kid will appreciate it, because he has no choice.

As I am new to this raising kids thing, I certainly would love to hear all of your experience, whether it's a failure or a success. If it's a failure, I wouldn't mind learning from your mistakes. If it's a success, there is no reason you don't share - you should be proud and brag about it!!


#onparenting
DearJulie

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Workout of the weekend:
Kayaking
Tennis
Paddle Boarding
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Workout of today: swimming 50 minutes
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